Wednesday, September 14, 2011

The F-word

Strip is my talker.

If I pick her up from school (or in our previous life met her at the bus stop), by the time we get to the house, I know what everyone had for lunch, was wearing that day, what color they were on and then some. I can get a verbatim play-by-play of the entire 8 hour day, usually in one breath.

Nugget? Not so much. He will talk and talk and talk, but gives me NO information about what's going on at school. How was school? "Good." What did you do? "Nuffin'." What was your favorite part of the day? "Snack" (which I pack him). What was your favorite part of after school? "Eatin' lunch" (which I also pack him). What was your favorite thing about school that DIDN'T involve food? "Goin' outside."

So, I had to really control my excitement when, after getting in the car, Nugget said without prompting:

Nugget: Oh! Mom!! GUESS what happened at school today?!

Me: Hmmm Captain Jack sailed the Black Pearl onto the play ground?

Nugget: Noooooo You'll never guess!!

Me: Ok, what happened?

Nugget: I said the F-word for de WHOLE CLASS!!!

At this point, I am trying my very best not to drive the car off a bridge and also not freak out. Nugget thinks everything is hilarious, and the last thing I needed to show him was some crazy-freak out reaction to a four-letter word as to encourage him to say it again.

But my mind is racing.

No one said anything to me, but car pick-up doesn't lend itself to chats with the teacher, and another teacher put him in the car, so there wasn't really a chance to talk. No one's called me. No one emailed me...yet.

But more importantly, how does he KNOW the F-word, and on top of that, how does he know to refer to the F-word as "The F-word."

Stay calm.

Me: Really Buddy?

Nugget: Yeah, I said it really loud and good for de whole class!

Me: bracing myself Can you say the F-word for me?

Nugget: Sure! Fffffffffffffffffffff-ARM! FARM is an F-word!



It turns out that the letter of the week that week was F. And when they introduce the letter of the week, they write letter words (in this case, F-words) on the board and the kids get to help think them up. Nugget had raised his hand and come up with "farm" on his own (no teacher hints like, "Old McDonald had a....), and the teacher was SO proud of him. She doted on my little buddy and it was right before pick-up, so it was fresh on his mind.

So glad I don't have the potty-mouth kid in school and will not have to write multiple letters of apology to all of the parents in Nugget's class!

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