Whoa. I'm a slacker.

So much so, that it took me two tries to log into my blogger account!

It's been a while since I updated, and I can't believe how many posts I haven't posted! So, I will do my best to back-blog and link back to this post so I can (hopefully) keep things in chronological order. But, for a teaser, here's a little overview of what's been going on in the lives of Nugget and Strip (and me and Hubs)!

I had a big birthday, that I somehow never finished the blog about (must be the old age!), Strip lost a tooth, Hubs ruined another relaxing beach vacation, shortly after Strip re-wrote a Berenstain Bears book, Nugget said the "F-word" for his preschool class, I re-organized the pantry, both kids started playing soccer, bought some new shoes and got put in my place at the running store, we ran (and FINISHED!!) a half-marathon, great-reader Strip discovered bathroom graffiti, we headed up to Tennessee for a sibling reunion and (almost) got some back-woods themed t-s to go along with the trip, I put a bunch of stuff in the consignment sale (and they lost our largest item!), Strip did her first diorama, we checked out the "super great" Children's museum in town, the Big Screen is back and we built a fire pit, the power went out and I had to get creative to get the car out of the garage, we went geocaching, the power went out again and I found a surprise in the garbage can, trick-or-treating sans Hubs, I almost got into a fight over some HDN's, my car got one-upped in the parking lot, Strip gets recruited on the soccer field, I got the most expensive oil change ever, I got the most painful eyebrow wax ever, Nugget dresses himself (using only 2 pairs of pants), Strip drops the F-bomb during family game night, Hubs and I took our second honeymoon, Felix came back, Hubs goes Grizwald on our house for Christmas, I failed at Christmas card picture taking, Strip (finally!) lost her second tooth, Strip and I got strep, took an acceptable picture and ordered cards just in time for a facial injury, Nugget touched Felix and Nugget put the smack down on politically correct Christmas songs.

Did you catch all of that? I've got some typing to do!

That's life!

After meeting with Strip's teacher, I learned that she needed a parent volunteer on Friday. So, I declared Friday as my day off and told her I'd be there when she needed me.

I was excited to show up for my first day. I love school (now that I don't go there) and this age is just SO much fun. The parking lot was packed, so I kind of made myself my own spot at the end of the row of teacher cars.

I hopped out, slammed the door, started walking to the office, reached back and hit the lock button on my keys and glanced back to make sure it actually locked.

And that's when I saw this.

Yup. There's me, on the right, proudly displaying my 13.1 sticker! And there someone (I'm 99% sure this is actually Strip's teacher's car) subtly one-upping me with a 26.2.

Just a reminder that there will always be someone in life who is better than you. That's a fact. Just try not to park next to them!

Trick-or-Treat!

No, we didn't carve pumpkins this year. But I did carve a turkey and cheese sandwich! So needless to say, Halloween this year was just insane.

Hubs was out of town on the actual day, so we'd done a family trunk-or-treat at a local church. Halloween was on a Monday (boooo) but not just any Monday!

I went to work, left Nugget in afterschool, raced across town for Strip's parent-teacher conference (she's fantastic! Only concern is that she's "too nice" and might get walked all over), scooted over to a friend's house to pick Strip up (who went home with the friend, thank goodness because there was a miscommunication and my poor baby was waiting at carline thinking I was never coming), raced back across town to pick up Nugget, then BACK across town to our house.

Did I mention Hubs was out of town?

Since it's our first Halloween and it was a school night, I invited some friends of ours over for dinner and T-o-T-ing in our 'hood. They homeschool their kids, so no worries if they're driving home at 9pm!

But they were coming for dinner!

Toss the kids in the house, start boiling some Halloween noodles, and pulling costumes together.

Strip was Dorothy (thank you, ebay seller, for allowing my child to not look like a stripper) and Nugget was Capt. Jack "Spiro" (thank you, other ebay seller, for letting my child be Capt Jack in the old school original Disney costume, not the polyester, flammable, see-through one!). Two years ago, Strip was Fancy Nancy and June Bug was her posh puppy. Last year, Nugget was Batman and Zoe was Joker. So this year, we decided to let Zoe go with Strip's costume. I found a bat costume, be we tied on her wings and declared her a flying monkey!

And for me? I was Elphaba. Yup. The wicked, green witch. Thank you, Strip, for suggesting I would make a "Great Elphaba!"

I found a gothic, black dress, on sale, in the jr's department of Party City and bought some green make-up/paint at Target for $.90. LESS THAN A DOLLAR! Who wouldn't let their kids slather green all over her for less than a dollar? I topped it off with a long black wig.

Then I looked at the three of us. All in wigs. Me painted green. Nugget with a beard and mustache. And our dog wearing wings. Great way to meet the neighbors!

We had a fun night going around the 'hood, came home to count our loot, said good-bye to our friends and I hosed off the kids and put them to bed.

Then I attempted to de-green myself.

Here's a little tip. If you don't normally wear a lot of make-up, meaning you don't need make-up remover, and you buy green face/body paint for under a dollar, go the extra mile and purchase a little make-up remover. Or something. Otherwise, you will take three showers with dish soap.

And still find green paint in your hairline the next morning. You've been warned!

Ahhhhh FREAK OUT!

As I mentioned, sometimes our power just goes out. For fun.

The kids and I came home today, and when I pressed the button on the garage door opener, nothing happened.

I got closer, and nadda.

I assume the battery's dead in my remote, so hop out and hit the keypad. Zilch.

Yay, the power's out again.

No big deal! I had "clean out my car" on my t0-do list, so we broke into the house, let Zoe out and the kids hit the yard. I gathered some trash and headed over to the toss it in the can. The trash JUST came, so there's not much in the can, but as lift the lid to toss in some carbage (get it? car+garbage!) I notice something odd.

So I open the lid a little wider.

That's odd... We just took the trash out, and there's so much loose trash in the can...hmmm..

At this point, I open the lid, shove my head in a little more

Ew! Is that poop?! Who just THROWS poop in a garbage can?! I mean, when we pick up Zoe's poop, we toss it in here, but "just poop" would mean that someone picked up poop with their bare hands! Who does that?!

Now I have my head and shoulders peering into the garbage can.

And that's when my eyes met the beady little eyes of this fellow:

Yes. We like Chick-fil-a, but that's not the point! Oh my raccoon!!!! In the trash can! One centimeter closer and that thing's clawing my eyes out and giving me rabies!

So I did what any rational person would do.

I slammed the door and screamed, "OH MY BATHTUBS!! THERE'S A FREAKING RACCOON IN THE TRASH CAN!!!"

Which of course means that as I go to get my phone to take a picture, the kids are stacking up the recycling bins to peer in and get a peek, causing me to scream, "Get down! That thing will claw your face off!"

I'm guessing the jerk raccoon was making his weekly stop in our can. Unfortunately for him, trash was delayed a day for the holiday and he didn't get the memo. So where there should have been some trash to eat, enjoy and get a boost back out, there was one measly bag in the bottom and he couldn't get out.

Hubs, of course, was out of town, but told me to leave that jerk in the can until he got home (we have some issues with raccoons. And armadillos. And burrowing animals). But I felt bad for the stupid thing. But not bad enough to do anything besides tossing a little bit more trash in there. Not to squish him! Just to give him a little umph to get out of the can.

And the next morning, I stood on the kids' stacked green bins, peeked in and nothing there! He escaped!

And I will be forever afraid to open our outdoor garbage. As will many others in my life, including my mother.

Geocaching!

The kids had Monday off from school, so instead of having a lazy day in our PJ's we decided to go geocaching. I honestly can't remember where I came across geocaching, it seemed like a fun thing to do that was like a treasure hunt and would get the kids and dog outside for a nice long time, so off to the park we went!

I explained how geocaching worked, pulled up the app on my phone, leashed up the pup and we were off! 25 minutes later, we'd found nothing, so I figured someone moved the cache and we were off to the next one. Thorns, stepping in holes, tripping over logs, and kids letting go of the squirrel-chasing dog, we failed to find #2.

And the kids were getting cranky.

And honestly? So was I.

WE'RE HAVING FUN! THIS IS A TREASURE HUNT! UGH, SOMEONE GET THE DOG!

I told the kids we'd walk to the park (about a mile away from where we were!), and as we got closer, up popped another one.

I convinced the kids to look for this one as the description lead me to believe it was pretty big and the location stated that it was easy to find. How could we fail!

We tromped along many paths and came to a clearing where we all felt it HAD to be.

And then, we saw it!

The kids found it!! And Nugget, while leaning on the log to get a closer look, squished his hand in bird poop.

They looked at me and asked what was in it. Only one way to find out (insert silent prayer that there was nothing scary, dead, alive or inappropriate hiding in the ammo box...)

TREASURE!!!!

The rules state that you have to leave something if you take something, and all we had was a poop bag, so we signed the book and found a new hiding place. And the kids were hooked! As we set off down the trail, I refreshed my list and up popped another one that was "for kids only." I told the kids they had to find it, traded my phone for Zoe's leash and let them lead the way.

Once we got close enough that we were close, but every step we took got us farther away, we took a left and headed into the woods (getting many strange looks from people jogging/biking/walking on the trail).

Nugget spotted this one, but they worked together to dig it out of the stick pile.

And when they opened it up, Strip's reaction was, "They weren't kidding! This one IS for kids!!"

TONS of toys that both kids were going nuts over! But, since we didn't have anything to trade, I let them both sign the book and start looking for a new (close) place to hide it.

So after our first 'caching experience, everyone had fun, I got fussed at for not bringing toys to trade out and no one got ticks. Or poison ivy. Or bitten by a snake.

So all in all, a successful afternoon! Can't wait to look for caches all over town!

Lights out

In the great state of Florida, we sometimes have storms. And sometimes, those storms cause power outages. And sometimes, the power just goes out even if there is no storm.

And that's what happened today.

The kids and I were at home, enjoying our Saturday, and I told them we'd head to the Halloween store to get some costume accessories. No sooner had we gone out to load up in the car, out went the power.

Grrrrreeeeaaat.

What's the problem?

The problem is that my car is in the garage. And our garage door needs power to go up, allowing my car to back out. Now, I know what your saying. Giant eye roll and, "Pull the red cord and lift the door yourself, lazy!" Well, that's exactly what I did.

Unfortunately, the garage door element that holds the door up when said power is out was not on/in/around/a part of our garage door.

So, I'd lift it up. It would fall back down. I'd THROW it up. It would come back down. It would remain above the ground about 2 feet, but my car is a little larger than that. So there's the problem.

I could hold the door up, arms extended over my head, and standing on my tippy toes, but that would leave the kids in charge of backing the car out of the garage. Not a good idea.

If Nugget were to stand on Strip's shoulders, they could probably hold it up high enough, but that probably falls in the "Not a good idea" category, too.

I was left with one choice; get creative.

And the results? Well, they speak for themselves:

Yup. Let's see... trash can! Hmm that's not tall enough... Trash can AND a hard cooler! Nope, still not tall enough... Oh! Rolling trash can + cooler + empty trash can= Open garage door!

After I stabilized my tower, I locked the kids and dog in the house, cranked the car and prayed nothing slipped. A few seconds later, the car was out of the garage, the kids were safely buckled, our trash cans were back in their spots, and we were pulling out of the driveway!

And so what if the power came back on as we pulled away....

Reader, reader, what do you see...

I see trouble looking at me.

Side note: Did you know you can buy public bathroom signs on ebay? Because you can.

Anyhoo, fall is here and that means it's time for the (almost) annual Hubs Sibling Reunion weekend in the beautiful mountains of Tennessee! We found a cabin two years ago in Pigeon Forge and it was PERFECT for our clan! We decided to rent it last year, but it was already booked, so we booked WAY in advance for 2011. Which meant we were traveling during the school year for a trip that we planned when the kids were in a different school system and one SIL was SUPER pregnant! Yay!

We got the kids at school pick-up and started making our trip north. If I were driving, we would make as few stops as possible, but Hubs was behind the wheel which meant we stopped for dinner 2 hours in and gas/bathrooms 1.5 hours later (because it would make too much sense to get gas and pee in the same zip code where you had dinner).

Hubs starts pumping gas, and I take the kids into the "store" to use the bathroom. We walked by a row of chain-smoking gamblers who were smoking (well, does it count as "smoking" if the cigarette is just dangling on your lower lip while smoke is swirling around you?) IN the gas station while playing the slots! Hello, middle Georgia. So nice to see you!

I corralled everyone into the Ladies room and found a stall to stuff everyone into. As I was helping Nugget to levitate around the grossness, Strip is looking at all of the writing on every wall of the stall.

Strip: Why would someone write all over the walls? 'Don't marry a man for his looks or riches, marry him for what's..'

Me: AHHH!! TURN AROUND! Turn around! Just stop reading and don't touch anything!!

Mind you, this was after the dinner stop bathroom discussion where she said, "Why would they have a trash can IN the bathroom stall with a sticker on it that specifically says, 'No Trash?' That seems silly! What do they want you to put in there?!"

If my sister-in-law could give birth at the cabin this weekend, we may win the prize for awkward moments.